May 2013
The problem with us girls is that we fall for boys...
obamasdaughterssister:
obamasdaughtersboyfriend:
obamasdaughter:
obamathepresident:
obamasdaughtersboyfriend:
obamasdaughter:
I love my boyfriend <3
I love my girlfriend
remember to wear protection
wtf dad
Wtf mr president
omg lol busted
Parents: What foreign language class are you taking this year?
Me: Math.
ex-cuse-u:
i was browsing through ellen degeneres’ youtube videos and when i was watching her interview segments i noticed a trend where she keeps the comments enabled for all of her adult interviews but when she has a child on the show she disables any of the comments to protect the child from any bullying or negative feedback and that is why she and her team of producers are incredible
imaginarycircus:
rabioheab:
my one dream is to travel back in time to the middle ages and bring some large speakers and loudly play a skrillex song and watch everyone freak the fuck out
Best wishes on your exorcism.
“One time I went shopping for shirts and suits, but then I found the most...”
– Benedict Cumberbatch, excerpt from Neigh magazine (via finnemores)
pizza:
poo-sex:
sometimes i wonder what goes through people’s heads before they create their URL
wise words from tumblr user poo-sex
rneerkat:
i hate when people say “tanks” instead of “thanks” like youre only expressing gratitude to me with 5/6 effort thats rude
bmoburns:
oomshi:
soup that tastes great is souper
may i interest you in a bowl of canned u not
padfootandprongles:
owlcitymordred:
stagdoeandfawn:
catully:
brigwife:
latitudeoctopus:
brigwife:
wait you mean you don’t use the word ‘fortnight’ in america???
Wait what? Then what do they use?
they don’t have a word
what do you mean they don’t have a word what kind of uncivilised people are they??
the fuck is a fortnight
It’s a word for ‘two weeks’
no it isn’t fortnight...
they-call-me-wonder-woman:
h0odrich:
It’s mad depressing when u eat the last piece of candy but you didn’t look at the bag and realize it was the last one so you could truly appreciate it for what it was worth
This speaks to me on a deep emotional level.
clamperl:
clamperl:
I HAVE A TEST TOMORROW AND I LOST THE NOTES
When the bell rings for the end of school
laugh-addict:
The kids are like:
When the bell rings for the end of school
And the teacher is like:
shannananan:
mercimonamie:
i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.
oh my god you managed to one up john green.
daddyfuckedme:
wouldn’t it be cool if jellyfish floated around in air instead of water but they didn’t sting you instead they gave you little kisses and rubbed your forehead with their tentacles
allthemerthurfeels:
colsandbradders:
colfercupcakes:
mandorways:
I love how people on my dash are talking about gay subtext in Supernatural or Teen Wolf…
… and then comes Merlin and outgays everything.
not…. everything.
lol
are
you
sure
?
it’s not like they were just having sex or anything
dntfearthereaper:
Restraining yourself from making inappropriate jokes in a new friendship because you don’t know if they’ll laugh or start running away
everyone: thor don't do the thing
thor: I'm gonna do the thing
everyone: loki don't do the thing
loki: I did the thing fifteen minutes ago but will pretend that I did not do the thing
nahthatsnotveryraven:
SOMEONE ON THE STREET BELOW MY OPEN WINDOW IS HOLDING AN ACTUAL BOOM BOX PLAYING I BLESS THE RAINS DOWN IN AFRICA AND SCREAMING “TAKE ME BACK LINDA” WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON
“We are the generation of nostalgia. We grew up in the age of transition. From...”
– this explains the 90s kids (via thebbcisslowlykillingme)
theyellowbrickroad:
money doesnt buy happiness but i cant say id be upset in the least bit if i suddenly inherited 5 million dollars
reallyreallyreallytrying:
medusa, trying to turn you to stone, but you accidentally called her “melissa” when you first walked in and now you’re too embarrassed to look at her. “it’s alright” she keeps saying “i get it all the time” but you still won’t look. u don’t even remember the stone thing until later
twinkletwinkleyoulittlefuck:
happybutts:
peacocks look like they speak french
